Energy Drunk

Engine Oil.

My goodness this is maybe the worst one I've had in all these years. It's bitter and acrid, giving almost instant stomach ache. Almost impressive really, to create a beverage that gives zero enjoyment except I don't feel impressed, I feel angry. Like, how dare they? You wouldn't slap jam on a slice of bread and sell it as victoria sponge would you?. It's offensively bad as if they hate us as consumers. Is this really all we deserve: Water, sugar, lemon juice and caffeine? Oh and the colouring that they generously add to make it look like the inevitable stingy piss it'll produce.

This drink is fucking bereft man, just chuck a Pro Plus in a glass of water with a squeeze of lemon and it'd be better.